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Boss Bitch

Simon's Avatar Picture Simon – December 18, 2007 02:38PM Reply Quote
For all your work woes.

ARL (Moderator) – August 26, 2014 07:45PM Reply Quote
I whinge therefore I am!
I can see the business card: "Ragnar Sparby Esq."

John Willoughby – August 28, 2014 06:18AM Reply Quote
Cyberdyne Systems Customer Support
Sparby Bloodaxe. (Sparby Bluetooth actually makes sense...)

Cloudscout – August 29, 2014 09:28AM Reply Quote
Det finnes ikke dårlig vær, bare dårlige klær!
I guess I won't be returning to my ancestral lands anytime soon. HR cancelled the exit interview meeting that was scheduled for Tuesday as, once again, I've landed a new role within the company at the last minute. This one, however, will have me flying to Seattle every Monday morning and flying back home every Thursday night for the foreseeable future.

El Jeffe – August 29, 2014 10:13AM Reply Quote
What a journey.
good. i guess….

Cloudscout – August 29, 2014 10:29AM Reply Quote
Det finnes ikke dårlig vær, bare dårlige klær!
It beats being unemployed... and, actually, I suspect I will actually enjoy the travel part of it for a while anyway. It'll be the polar opposite of the working-from-home gig I've had for the last 16 months.

El Jeffe – August 29, 2014 10:44AM Reply Quote
What a journey.
Too bad they don't make a Maxwell jet, right?
[Benny drove Maxwells, which were made in my little hometown and later became Chrysler. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maxwell_automobile]

Quote
the largest automobile factory in the world in New Castle, Indiana.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/29/2014 10:45AM by El Jeffe.

porruka (Admin) – September 04, 2014 05:59AM Reply Quote
Failure is pre-greatness.
Not so much a bitch about a boss but a cautionary tale for those who are looking for bosses to bitch about...

You may have heard that you need to make your resume stand out. You may also be aware that everyone and their dog now requires you to submit your resume through an "applicant tracking system" (ATS). These approaches are generally not compatible with each other, as I got first-hand confirmation yesterday.

I was talking to a recruiter who was asking me for things that were already present on the front page of my resume. Confused, I dug deeper. "Oh," he says. "When I pull up the original version of your resume, I see." The actual submission is not getting to the people who need to see the efforts of trying to make it stand out. Despite all the advice from recruiters and hiring managers to "break the mold to get noticed", the ATS does its damnedest to strip anything that doesn't conform to some unpublished standard.

It's a good thing I had added under my "Pre-2001" header "Dancing around a large black monolith, throwing bones in the air and making rude noises." Seriously -- that line is what generated the call and got the opportunity to expose the _actual_ resume.

The lesson? The hiring/recruiting process is more fucking broken than even the people who know it is broken know.

Not only are you expected to customize your resume for each position but for the ATS front-end now.

ddt – September 04, 2014 07:22AM Reply Quote
Good insight, P. On a smaller scale, it's interesting to see how some systems (you never know ahead of time -- Taleo and what Accenture uses try to strip all data and put it into their own format in a Word (literally, MS Word) file, so your PDF gets mangled).

ddt

bahamut – September 04, 2014 03:37PM Reply Quote
make sure you get paid in norwegian krone but get to work from home plus some all-expenses paid trips for "cultural understanding"… then you're set.

Mokers (Moderator) – September 04, 2014 05:30PM Reply Quote
Formerly Remy Martin
Still jobs available at my company!

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/sad/4644475163.html

This is for a mac consultant, but we also have manager and senior PC consultant positions available.

John Willoughby – September 05, 2014 11:28AM Reply Quote
Cyberdyne Systems Customer Support
>Solid foundation in Simpsons, Star Wars, Monty Python, and Godfather references

Excellent corporate values, though I would swap Futurama for the Godfather. And/or Archer.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/05/2014 11:28AM by John Willoughby.

porruka (Admin) – September 05, 2014 11:39AM Reply Quote
Failure is pre-greatness.
Quote
Mokers
Still jobs available at my company!

http://sfbay.craigslist.org/eby/sad/4644475163.html

This is for a mac consultant, but we also have manager and senior PC consultant positions available.

Well, apparently companies are still baiting recruiters to fill pipelines that they themselves aren't ready to fill. :-|

Perhaps share a link for the managerial position? JW would be one of my references, so take that as you will. (Wait, this is Boss Bitch. Perhaps I should re-think that.)

Cloudscout – September 05, 2014 12:26PM Reply Quote
Det finnes ikke dårlig vær, bare dårlige klær!

Mokers (Moderator) – September 05, 2014 04:00PM Reply Quote
Formerly Remy Martin
that is the one.

ARL (Moderator) – September 05, 2014 11:16PM Reply Quote
I whinge therefore I am!
No mention of how fast you can do the Kessel run?

John Willoughby – September 07, 2014 06:53AM Reply Quote
Cyberdyne Systems Customer Support
Quote
ARL
No mention of how fast you can do the Kessel run?

Then you'd get into that whole unit-of-time/unit-of-distance argument. I'd just tell prospective employees that they'd have to memorize either the Jedi or Sith code before starting work. (And which one they choose is kind of a Meyers-Briggs personality test all by itself.)

ddt – September 07, 2014 09:21AM Reply Quote
What if the candidate asked, "which is shorter?"

ddt

porruka (Admin) – September 07, 2014 09:44AM Reply Quote
Failure is pre-greatness.
Quote
ddt
What if the candidate asked, "which is shorter?"

ddt

Size doesn't matter, just don't shoot first.

John Willoughby – September 08, 2014 09:40AM Reply Quote
Cyberdyne Systems Customer Support
Quote
ddt
What if the candidate asked, "which is shorter?"

ddt

"That's the Jar-Jar Binks Code. See yourself out, please."

porruka (Admin) – September 08, 2014 10:36AM Reply Quote
Failure is pre-greatness.
Mokers,

Is there a special handshake or secret entrance if one is going to apply?

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